A World Without Managerial Blunders

At the start of the season, Lewey’s Legends boss Larraldinho took a look at what the league table would look like if every manager had played their best possible Starting XI in every game. With more than half of the season now gone, I thought it would be a good idea to re-examine this piece of analysis.

Firstly, lets remind ourselves of what the league table looks like as it stands today, with 20 matches played:

1 Chris Talling’s XI 40 745
2 Boz’s Pandas 40 657
3 The Groovy Penguins 39 714
4 The Hammerheads 39 652
5 Elm Grove Elite 32 692
6 Peperami Barmy Army 30 640
7 Leweys Legends 30 593
8 Real Sosobad 29 704
9 Ozone Athletic 28 713
10 Gooch United 25 577
11 Clem’s Lems 24 563
12 Team fisher8080 24 561
13 Bobbond Allstars 18 608
14 Salamanders 18 571

 

Ok, so Talling good, Sala’s bad. Got it. Next we take a look at which results would have changed had we all actually been decent managers. Even though many of us are far from decent, on multiple levels. Not naming names but you know who you are. These results account for the manager changing to any valid formation if needed.

Week 20

Ozone Athletic 26 Leweys Legends 29 >>> Ozone Athletic 37 Leweys Legends 35

 

Week 18

Chris Talling’s XI 54 Ozone Athletic 42 >>> Chris Talling’s XI 55 Ozone Athletic 58
Clem’s Lems 41 Elm Grove Elite 43 >>> Clem’s Lems 48 Elm Grove Elite 47

 

Week 13

Chris Talling’s XI 28 Gooch United 27 >>> Chris Talling’s XI 28 Gooch United 29
The Hammerheads 33 Leweys Legends 29 >>> The Hammerheads 36 Leweys Legends 38
Ozone Athletic 35 Elm Grove Elite 35 >>> Ozone Athletic 35 Elm Grove Elite 39

 

Week 12

Gooch United 28 Boz’s Pandas 30 >>> Gooch United 33 Boz’s Pandas 30
Elm Grove Elite 26 Chris Talling’s XI 26 >>> Elm Grove Elite 26 Chris Talling’s XI 27

 

Week 11

Team fisher8080 39 Leweys Legends 38 >>> Team fisher8080 40 Leweys Legends 41

 

Week 9

Gooch United 29 Real Sosobad 29 >>> Gooch United 41 Real Sosobad 30

 

Week 8

Elm Grove Elite 31 Gooch United 23 >>> Elm Grove Elite 36 Gooch United 38
Chris Talling’s XI 36 Salamanders 37 >>> Chris Talling’s XI 41 Salamanders 38

 

Week 5

Ozone Athletic 44 Chris Talling’s XI 41 >>> Ozone Athletic 44 Chris Talling’s XI 49
Gooch United 34 Team fisher8080 24 >>> Gooch United 36 Team fisher8080 36
Bobbond Allstars 40 Salamanders 50 >>> Bobbond Allstars 56 Salamanders 51

 

Week 4

Clem’s Lems 29 The Hammerheads 30 >>> Clem’s Lems 32 The Hammerheads 31
Boz’s Pandas 33 Ozone Athletic 32 >>> Boz’s Pandas 35 Ozone Athletic 37

 

Week 2

Real Sosobad 34 Boz’s Pandas 35 >>> Real Sosobad 35 Boz’s Pandas 35

 

Week 1

Team fisher8080 39 Real Sosobad 33 >>> Team fisher8080 46 Real Sosobad 46

 

But what does this all mean? Well for one thing, the week Ozone beat Talling, Talling should have won and the week Talling beat Ozone, Ozone should have won. But apart from those cancelling each other out, there were lots of league-changing results. Will Penguins go top? Will Bobbond go bottom? Let’s look at the all important league table.

1 Chris Talling’s XI 42 790 No Change
2 The Groovy Penguins 39 765 UP 1
3 Gooch United 34 656 UP 7
4 Ozone Athletic 33 792 UP 5
5 The Hammerheads 33 724 DOWN 1
6 Leweys Legends 33 663 UP 1
7 Boz’s Pandas 32 715 DOWN 5
8 Real Sosobad 30 799 No Change
9 Peperami Barmy Army 30 701 DOWN 3
10 Clem’s Lems 30 663 UP 1
11 Elm Grove Elite 27 757 DOWN 6
12 Bobbond Allstars 21 689 UP 1
13 Team fisher8080 20 633 DOWN 1
14 Salamanders 12 614 No Change

 

So no change at the very top or the very bottom, but an absolutely huge leap for Gooch United. UTG (Up the Gooch). A 7-step climb for the Swordsmen (new nickname based on logo) into the money spots.

The big losers of the piece are Elm Grove Eggies who drop 6 places into shitsville. Where they belong some might say. And Salamanders go from bad to worse, a full 8 points behind their nearest competitor for the Arse Award, with an abysmal record of 4-16.

Finally lets look at the difference between the actual and dream leagues:

1 Gooch United 9 79
2 Clem’s Lems 6 100
3 Ozone Athletic 5 79
4 Bobbond Allstars 3 81
5 Leweys Legends 3 70
6 Chris Talling’s XI 2 45
7 Real Sosobad 1 95
8 Peperami Barmy Army 0 61
9 The Groovy Penguins 0 51
10 Team fisher8080 -4 72
11 Elm Grove Elite -5 65
12 The Hammerheads -6 72
13 Salamanders -6 43
14 Boz’s Pandas -8 58

 

What does this show us?

  1. Clemo has squandered the most points on his bench this season, the only team to hit 100 points wasted, which contributing to two wins disappearing. In the real league, only “Zero Logins” Fisher has scored less fantasy points. Snapping at his heels, however, is the perennial Sheikh of Shitness, Mr Rosh Jees on 95. Perhaps this shows that his reputation for bad benchings is fully deserved.
  2. Pandas have benefited the most from poor opposition management, 8 points better off than they should be. Proving once and for all that their current lofty league position is down to our collective shitness rather than Borrill’s managerial excellence.
  3. Salamanders’ bench is just as shit as its starters

Do you draw any other conclusions from this data? Let the group know, sharing is caring.

Cheers,

Your friendly Commish.

 

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